Thursday, March 15, 2012

In My Weakness

I would like to ask all my readers to please begin praying with me, as I endeavor to embark on a journey.  A journey that will be long and will require wisdom from the Lord.  I'm beginning to write a book that I pray every step of the way will bring honor and glory to our Father, and will encourage and uplift many people, saved and unsaved.  The name of the book will be "In My Weakness : My Journey with God through Physical Challenges" 
I appreciate all the prayer I can get as I seek to please our Lord with the writing ability He has given me!
Thank you all, and God bless!!!

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

"Take the Best Examples For Your Pattern"

Charles Spurgeon's Morning by Morning excerpt today was one that I felt I needed to share.  His enlightening words and challenge were derived from 1 Corinthians 10:12, which reads, "Let him tat thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall." ...I will not share the entire challenge presented, but I will share the majority; the part that spoke most to me. 
"...Take heed that thou gloriest not in thy graces, but let all thy glorying and confidence be in Christ and His strength, for only so canst thou keep from falling.  Be much more in prayer.  Spend longer time in holy adoration.  Read the Scriptures more earnestly and constantly.  Watch you lives more carefully.  Live nearer to God.  TAKE THE BEST EXAMPLES FOR YOUR PATTERN.  Let your conversation be redolent of heaven.  Let your heart be perfumed with affection for men's souls.  So live that men may take knowledge of you that you have been with Jesus, and have learned of Him; and when that happy day shall come, when He whom you love shall say, 'Thou has fought the good fight, thou has finished thy course, and henceforth, there is laid up for thee a crown of righteousness which fadeth not away.'  On, Christian, with care and caution!  On, with holy fear and trembling!  On, with faith and confidence in Jesus alone, and let your constant petition be, 'Uphold me according to Thy word!"  He is able, and He alone, 'to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy.' "

     This entire excerpt really challenged me to look to the Lord more and to study His life, that I may pattern my own life after His!  The challenge that really stuck out to me however was; "take the best examples for your pattern."  First of all, as I just mentioned, I thought of Christ as my example to pattern my life after.  Then, as I thought of my greatest examples in the Christian life, my first thought went to someone that perhaps you would not expect.  Someone young.  Someone that my thoughts turn to when I think of love and adoration, yes, but someone that most young women may not be able to think of when they think of someone who is strong in the faith and earnest in their walk with the Lord.  It should be possible for each woman, young or old, to look to this great influence as a great person of God; someone that puts Christ first in all things, putting sleep, pleasure, even themselves after time in honest prayer and petition before God.  Yes, the first person on this earth I thought of that I desire to pattern my spiritual life after is my husband.  Yes, he is young ... but he has great wisdom and desire.  I think of the great words given to Timothy; "let no man despise thy youth."  I did not simply think of my husband because I love him so much and can not get him off my mind, which is probably true as well.  But as I honestly looked at each challenge Spurgeon presented, I thought of my husband's example in his walk with the Lord.  He is no where near perfect, and who better knows that than me, for I live with him.  But he strives to please the Lord in everything he does; and I mean everything.  I must be honest and say, sometimes I take no thought of it when he says, "I'm going to go pray for a while."  I am going to strive to make it a habit to go to the Lord in prayer myself during those times and most of all thank my Father for giving me a husband so concerned with the things of God. 
     I'm honored to have a husband who wants to glorify the Lord in all he does.  I have many great examples in my life, but I am elated that my first thought goes to Christ and my second goes to my husband; what great examples for my pattern! 

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Not unto death...

"When Jesus heard that, he said, This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God might be glorified thereby."  These beautiful words, which I think are my new life verse, are found in John 11:4. 
   For those of you who do not know me very well you may not know that I have a disease.  I have a nerve disorder called Fibromyalgia.  Doctors describe this disease as overactive nerves resulting in widespread chronic pain.  When I was a Junior in college and dating my husband, the small aches and pains I had for a few years, became nearly impossible to bare.  Because of the weight I lost and exhaustion, I never finished college, but rather went back to Indiana to seek treatment.  I also had another encounter with my skin cancer around the same time.  When the problems returned to this degree, I had been truly saved for less than a year.  However, I never felt the urge to become bitter or angry at God, but rather looked to Him far more because I knew I could not handle the pain on my own. 
   Some think that my Fibromyalgia does not give me the troubles that it use to, and respectfully I say...that's crazy!  Fibromyalgia is still a very mysterious disease.  It cannot be tested for through your blood, doctors do not know what causes it and there is still no known cure.  Medications help, but not all the time.  I believe, besides God Himself; my Momma (who also has the disease), and my wonderfully understanding husband are the only people who trully know how difficult it is to live this way. 
   I cannot imagine being unsaved and trying to deal with this disease.  Medications have helped and the encouragment God has given me through the man He placed in my life has been a true blessing, however, if it were not for the blessing of being able to run to my heavenly Father at any time and claiming the promises from His Word, I would not be able to handle the pain sometimes. 
   You may look at the verse I have selected to be my "life verse" and say ...isn't "not unto death" a little extreme for this disease that cannot actually kill you?  Allow me  to be frank; if it were not for Christ I may have taken my own life on a few occasions!  Yes! It gets that bad sometimes!  In my own efforts, I cannot ease the pain, no matter how many pills I try!  There are days when nothing dulls the pain!  I praise the Lord multiple times over for a loving husband who will do ANYTHING to try and help!  My favorite thing he does however, is drops everything when I've had enough of the pain, and cries out to our Lord on my behalf!  That has proven to be the best "sleeping pill".  I'm blessed beyond measure to have someone who knew what he was getting into and loved me anyway!  That's when I realize how much I see Christ in the man I have married.  Christ knew exactly what He was getting into when he came to this earth....yet He loved us and came anyway! 
   This verse in the Gospel of John is my greatest prayer for my life.  I know that my disease is not going anywhere (though the Lord could heal me if He chose to) and I am thankful for it!  It draws me closer to the only One who can truly give me relief and I am grateful for that!  But, I pray that through the pain, through the trials, my life will glorify Him!  If all that I go through is just so I can sympathize with one of my fellow Christians or lead a lost soul to Him, every twinge of pain, sleepless night, and tear is worth it! 
   More of my battle with this lies not in the physical, but the emotional and ultimately the spiritual side of it!  The pain makes me frustrated and literally angry sometimes!  I hate how the pain makes me when it gets too difficult to smile through!  I found that the only way to handle this is through prayer...prayer and more prayer!  Somedays, I feel like I'm praying the same thing over and over again all day long!  "Lord!  help me not to be frustrated!"  I have found it true every time that, "His grace is sufficient....made perfect in weakness..." and, "It is God that girdeth me with strength!" I pray that pride never sets in and that I say, "wow! I've made it through a lot."  Rather, I want to look back on my life and say, "glory to God, He brought me through a lot!"  I fail nearly everyday, but He is helping me to gain the victory in this battle.
   I must constantly remind myself when the pain becomes too much to handle; this is not unto death....but this is all for His name to be magnified....for all the glory belongs to Him!

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Friday, March 2, 2012

Church Decor

   Last night I finished the spring decorations for the church. I look forward to taking down the winter and putting the spring up tomorrow! :)  I definitely got my mom's love for flower arranging and decorating, and when I do these things it never feels like work to me!  Perhaps someday I'll jump into the family business and become a wedding planner, decorator and coordinator like my Momma! :) 
    There's nothing I enjoy more than doing things for our church!  I'm usually doing all the behind the scenes things, such as these decorations, bulletins, cleaning and nursery schedules, etc.  but I wouldn't have it any other way!  As a pastor's wife, it is not my job to be in the spot light!  Doing these odd jobs is what keep things less hectic and stressful for my husband.  He does not have to worry about the seemingly little things so he can keep his focus on studying and praying for our people and revival!  That's all part of being a help meet for him!  My utmost duty however is still prayer!  Praying for our people and praying for the Spirit to empower my husband and give him wisdom as he leads his flock!  We're blessed with wonderful, teachable people who love the Lord and just want to do what He pleases!  How grateful we are for these dear people who have such a servant's heart! 
    I'm kind of sad that I do not have more things to decorate for the church right now; I finished it all last night!  But I look forward to putting the things up and brightening the church for spring!  I'll post pictures soon!
    Have a wonderful day and remember to keep HIM first!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

New Pictures


        These pictures were taken last Sunday Morning at our church; Abundant Life Baptist Church, Naugatuck, CT.